Boogie Night

We attended the Nautilus party Thursday night at a local downtown club. We had to get special wristbands in advance, too.

When we got there, the special drink of the night was some sort of blue-tini, the kind of drink you'd see Captain Kirk offer to an intergalactic babe on one of those rare "nights out." Pam and Jenn each had one. I, on the other hand, abstained.

The stage was set for a band, but we didn't know who would be playing. Before any musicians appeared, there was already a star on display: the Nautilus One, the new piece of equipment that was unveiled for the first time Thursday afternoon at the IHRSA show.

The Nautilus One even had a spotlight all to itself, like it was going to sing for us or something. We decided that if it was going to sing, it would belt out tunes such as "Stayin' Alive," "I Will Survive" and my personal favorite, "YMCA."

Fitting in with the '70s theme, the band "Boogie Nights" made its way to the stage. The four members looked the part in '70s garb, complete with bell bottoms, chest-hair-showing shirts and wild '70s hair. The lead guitarist had one of those fros that looked like the one O.J. Simpson wore in the third "Naked Gun" movie. It was one of those can't-get-through-the-door kinda fros. He also had the high leg kick workin' as well as the Kiss-like tongue, which was both impressive and disturbing.

An Internet search revealed that "Boogie Nights" is a legit cover band from World Class Productions that Nautilus must have hired for the night. We were figuring that this was something the band did on the side. Here are the presumed day jobs for each member: lead singer--financial planner; lead guitarist--insurance salesman; bass player--high school guidance counselor; and drummer--stay-at-home dad.

When the lead singer handed over the mike to someone from Nautilus (who could sing pretty well, by the way), the lead singer found himself with some spare time. So during "Brick House," he went over and did a few reps on the machine, which was still on the stage. Later, the lead guitarist had the line of the night when he said, "It is an honor to be sharing the stage with such a fine piece of equipment!"

This band was much better than the one that played at the IHRSA opening reception. Plus, they had dancers in blonde wigs, two at the edge of the stage and two up on a crosswalk that was above and behind the stage. It was '70s disco meets '60s a-go-go.

I still wanted to hear the machine sing, though. Maybe dance, too.